Better By Mistake

"Mistake" is a bad word in a lot of people's minds. A lot of people seem to think they are meant to do everything perfectly all of the time and get very angry with themselves and others when they make mistakes. When I was younger, I had no patience for anyone's mistakes, even my own.

However, mistakes happen. We all make them. No matter how perfect we each think we are or how perfectly we believe we are doing things, there are times when we will make mistakes. It's just part of life. In fact, the word "mistake" by its very definition means an unintentional error.

The real question is whether we learn from our mistakes. Do you find yourself making the same mistake over and over again? If so, that is because you have yet to learn the lesson from that mistake. Whenever I make a mistake now, I take time to analyze it. To figure out exactly what happened and what the lesson I needed to learn from it was. More often than not, the lesson I have learned is usually a very good one and/or causes me to change directions in something I am working on that leads to a much better, yet unexpected result.

My personal rule is that I only get upset with my mistakes if I repeat them. That simply means I have not taken the time to figure out exactly where I went wrong to begin with. We all make mistakes, it's whether we learn from our mistakes or not that determines our own success. Remember, the more aware you become, the more successful you become.

1) The next time you make a mistake, stop for a moment. If you are the type of person who beats yourself up over your mistakes, pause. Breathe and remind yourself that mistakes happen. If you are the type of person who does not give one thought to your own mistakes and who keeps moving at a million miles per second, pause as well. Breathe and fully take in the mistake you have made just for a moment.

2) Regardless of your personality, take a minute and write down the mistake you just made, preferably in your journal. If you have the time at the very moment, write down the circumstances and what you may have done in error to cause that mistake. If you do not have the time, go back to this page in your journal that same evening and write about the mistake. Analyze what you could have done better, where your mistake was and what you are meant to learn from it. Did the mistake cause you to realize something you would not have otherwise? Did it show you something you had been overlooking? Every mistake has a message. Find it.

3) Now that you know the lesson from your mistake, let yourself off the hook. Realize that blame is not a helpful emotion. Instead, work on your awareness so that you do not repeat your same mistake.

Change Your Attitude and You Just Might Change Everything

Are you in a rut? Do find yourself complaining about everything, feeling unhappy, and lacking control in your life? Maybe you are sick of being stuck in the same routine day after day.

Furthermore, do you think you would be happy if only you made more money, had more purpose, were in better shape, drove a nicer car, or had a different job? If this sounds like the way you think on a day to day basis, it is time to snap out of the pity party you are having and to take back control of your life. When we get into ruts in our daily lives, we tend to blame everyone and everything else for the way we feel, and we think that if external things in our lives would change, then everything would be better. The fact is that the power to change everything in our lives lies with our ability to change our attitude. A negative attitude is a habit, and the only way to combat this very bad habit is to take back control of your thoughts and to teach yourself to think differently.

The first step is to realize that you cannot control the way other people think or behave just like you cannot control the traffic or the weather (despite the fact that we let these things ruin our mood on a daily basis!). However, you can, and must, learn to control the way you approach situations in your life. Despite the fact that you cannot control your environment, you can always control how you think! Start by evaluating the things in your life that cause you stress and identify the things that you can and cannot control in these situations. Next, control the controllables! Learn to let go of the things that are out of your control and start focusing on the things that you can change, namely your outlook and your attitude. This type of change happens from the inside-out. If you are willing to make an effort to change the way you think about the situations in your daily life, you will change the way you feel on a day to day basis, which will ultimately change the way you act. By changing the way you think, you will change everything! Your attitude and outlook on life influences your confidence and emotions, which, in turn, influence the choices you make that determine your productivity, efficiency, and successfulness. With a negative attitude, you are not only making yourself feel miserable, but you are preventing yourself from reaching your potential, as well.

Instead of using your mind to decrease your success, you must learn to use your thoughts to create a state of mind for excellence. One of the most important components of this new way of thinking is learning to be your own biggest fan. In other words, you must become your own loudest cheerleader. This might seem silly, but you probably do not even realize how seldom you pat yourself on the back for a job well done. In our society, it is common for us to seek approval from other people and we don't judge our own success until we receive a judgment from someone else. If others provide positive feedback, then we feel good about ourselves, and if others fail to provide feedback or give negative feedback, then we feel invalidated and under appreciated. You have undoubtedly been frustrated because something you did went unrecognized by your boss or your spouse and you have likely felt that other people in your life don not realize how much you sacrifice for your job. This habit of seeking and waiting for others to express appreciation or congratulations must stop. Why are you basing the success of your own work on someone else's opinion? You are an intelligent, logical, independent individual. Give yourself some credit! You know when you do good work, make sacrifices, and take risks. Tell yourself how proud you are! The only side effects of being proud of you are increased confidence, self-worth, and motivation.

If you are in a habit of negative thinking and you continually seek approval from others, learning to cheer for yourself will be a challenging task, and you may need guidance along the way, but it is a challenge you should take head on. You must break down the barriers. Start with the basics: Practice telling yourself how great you look, how capable you are, and how successful you will be. Start holding yourself accountable for good things to happen in your life. Take control of your health, your career, and your attitude. It is time to stop leaving your life up to chance and to stop blaming other people and things for your unhappiness and misdirection. Take control, put a smile on your face, and take a stand for you! Before you know it, everything will be different!

How Big is Your Plate Anyway

Between work, family, activities, meals, and so much more, it is easy to feel overwhelmed and stretched too thin, and being this feeling of being stretched becomes normal and expected in your daily life. If you aren't stressed, overwhelmed, and pushed to the limit, you think something is wrong or you don't know what to do with yourself. There is no doubt that live in a busy society. It seems like we keep taking on new responsibilities in our daily lives, without adjusting our schedules or focusing on our priorities, and it sometimes even seems that being busy has become some sort of crazy bragging right. The truth is that we often allow ourselves to get involved in too many different things, and when this happens, we start losing our grip and are unable to give any one thing enough focus things start slipping through the cracks.

It is important to remember that not all people are able to handle the same amount of activity, stress, and responsibility in their lives. Some of us can only handle one or two things at a time, while there are others who can successfully manage several activities at once. The key to success and sanity is to first understand how much you are capable of holding on your plate. That's right; imagine you have a large porcelain plate that you carry in front of you during all of your daily activities. Everything you have to do and all of your responsibilities rest on this plate. When your plate becomes too full, the first thing that happens is that things start falling off. When you don't listen to these warnings that your life gives you and you keep trying to maintain an over-packed schedule your plate will eventually start to crack. This is when you get yourself into trouble. Once your plate starts to crack, you start losing focus on the most important things in your life and things like your health, your relationships, and your sanity start to suffer. In other words, your plate serves as a foundation, and once that foundation begins to crumble, it is hard to keep anything together. Unfortunately, we don't often pay attention to the cracks in our plates until it is too late and the things we once thought of as priorities have fallen apart. This happens all too often in our society which is why it is so important that you take a few minutes to evaluate your life, your priorities, your schedule, and your capabilities before your plate starts to crumble.

The first thing you need to do is list your priorities. What are the most important things in your life? Maybe family, spirituality, and health are your priorities. You must make sure that these things have a place on your plate where they are nurtured, attended to, and loved. Once you have a pretty good idea of what is most important, ask yourself the critical question of the day: "How big is my plate anyway?" Truthfully, how much can you effectively and responsibly handle? It may take you some time to truly understand how big your plate is, but this type of self-awareness will allow you to grow, to develop, and to achieve success. It is important to get over the notion that having one hundred and one things going on and being stressed out are signs of success. That is just not true. Success comes in fulfilling your priorities, in enjoying the ride, and in feeling a sense of accomplishment. Make sure you always leave room on your plate for laughter, spontaneity, and surprise. Depriving ourselves from enjoying life does not make us more productive, only more miserable!

Once you have an understanding of how much you can truly handle at any one time, you have to next look at all of the responsibilities that you have. What things should be cut from your schedule and what things need more attention? You have to learn to say no when your plate is full and to ask for help when you need it most. This is extremely difficult for many people, and if you look at your at your schedule and find it packed with other people's errands and responsibilities, you know you have a problem. Don't be afraid to focus first on your own priorities and then if you have time, feel free to help out a friend. However, you should not start taking on other people's tasks when you don't have time to get your own things done.

Evaluating your capabilities and responsibilities is an ongoing process. You should be continually aware of how much you plate can hold and how stacked it is. In the midst of your busy schedule and running around from here to there, it is critical that you make time each day for your most important priorities. Even if it is five minutes, give yourself that time. Don't lose sight of your health. Be physically active and eat a healthy diet. Make time for your family. Listen. Be thankful for the gifts. Breathe. Not only will your plate stay strong and balanced but you will become more effective, more pleasant, and more successful, as well. So, before you go to bed tonight, ask yourself, "How big is my plate, anyway?"

Be Assertive

In all of your human interactions, whether personal, professional, or social, having the ability to tell others how you feel, what you think, and what you believe will influence the quality of your communication, your confidence, your perceived control, and ultimately, your achievements.

These critical skills are encompassed in the trait of assertiveness, which is one of the most important psychological skills related to success and well-being in all aspects of our lives. For some people, being assertive may come very naturally, while others continually struggle with expressing themselves to others. The best part of assertive behavior, however, is that it can be learned, practiced, and perfected. While not always an easy task, becoming more assertive is attainable for all people who are committed and dedicated to making a change.

In order to learn to be more assertive in your life, you have to first understand that being assertive means having the ability to honestly and straightforwardly express your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. This does not mean that in order to be more assertive you should go around telling everyone exactly how you feel and what you are thinking. The vital part of being assertive is learning to express yourself in a socially appropriate manner, meaning that you must understand and take into consideration the situation, environment, and people involved in all of your interactions. In doing this, you must learn to become aware of the potential consequences of your behavior. In other words, ask yourself what the potential outcomes of expressing yourself are. This is an important exercise as our fears of being assertive are revealed and we often realize that they are unrealistic and unfounded. Additionally, by reflecting on our own behavior, we become more aware of the consequences of not expressing ourselves. However, not all people who need to be more assertive are those who do not express themselves at all. Those individuals who are disruptive with their self-expression also need to work on their assertiveness and to evaluate the consequences of there overzealous expressions, which like lack of expression, include perceptions of lacking control and being misunderstood. Whatever your natural behavioral tendencies may be, it is likely that taking the time to work on your own assertiveness will increase the quality and satisfaction of your interactions.

Learning to be more assertive may seem frightening or even impossible. However, assertiveness is a trait that can be learned, practiced, and perfected if you are willing to dedicate the time and energy required. Additionally, becoming more assertive becomes a much easier task when assertiveness is broken down into four specific behaviors that can be targeted and practiced individually. The first of these behaviors is being able to say no. This is such an important skill to develop as it reflects an understanding of your own needs and limitations. When we can't say no to other people, we end up spending all of our time doing things for others and we lose control of our time. Being assertive is about maintaining control of your time, resources, and beliefs, and learning to say no is the first step in this direction. In order to achieve this skill, you have to have an understanding of your resources and your demands. What things do you have to get done? How much time do you have available? Is it realistic that your priorities will be met if you take on additional responsibilities for other people? The second component of assertive behavior is being able to start, continue, and end conversations. If you are going to be able to express yourself, you obviously have to be able to talk to people. Initiating and carrying on conversations with others is so important in developing the confidence to express how you feel and what you think. If this is a major challenge for you, set a simple goal to get started. For example, your goal could be to have a conversation with someone you know during your day. This is a great place to start as having a conversation with a familiar face is usually much easier than initiating a conversation with a stranger. This means that you will walk up to someone you know, start a conversation, carry on the conversation, and then, when you are ready to leave, wrap up the conversation. If this seems too overwhelming, start at the most basic level and challenge yourself to ask someone what time it is.

The key is to make it as simple or as challenging as you need. You want to experience success as you learn to be more assertive, so set your goals at the appropriate level for you. The third component of assertive behavior is being able to express both your positive and negative feelings, meaning that you need to make an effort to express how you feel to others. For example, it should become a habit to say things, such as "I feel happy", excited, or proud. Additionally, it means that you learn to express your negative feelings, such as "I feel disappointed", sad, or discouraged. If you typically avoid telling others how you feel and are more comfortable hiding your true emotions, this component of assertive behavior will be a difficult task that you need to conquer one step at a time. The final component of assertive behavior is being able to ask for help. Be aware of your limitations. When you are overwhelmed, overworked, and overstressed, ask other people to help you out. If you ignore these feelings and expect that someone should just offer to help, you will be run down and left alone in your struggles. If you need help, ask for it. Other people often don't know when to step in unless they are asked to do so.

However big the challenge seems, the key to becoming more assertive is to take it one step at a time. Each day, you should be working on achieving some component of assertive behavior. You may find some tasks to be fairly simple, while the mere thought of others might induce anxiety. Break the more difficult tasks down into small steps, and continue to practice and perfect the behaviors that come more naturally. While you don't want to overwhelm yourself, you have to remember that in order to become more assertive and to change your behavior, you need to step outside your comfort zone by taking risks and expressing what you think and believe. Over time, the behaviors will become more natural you will experience an increase in the quality of your interactions while you are creating new habits and methods of communication. Furthermore, taking the time and effort to work on your self-expression should be a part of your daily tasks, as creating and maintaining habits that foster assertiveness will increase the quality of your personal and professional relationship along with giving you more control of your life. All that you need to get started is the desire to change and to increase the quality of your interactions and most importantly to increase your over all well-being.

So, what are you waiting for? Put your feelings on the line and express yourself!

Quitters Do Win

We all share this common, yet miraculous ability to quickly notice when things suck. And we've all heard that quitting is bad, and quitters never win, so never ever quit. Never? Is there ever a time when quitting is a GOOD thing?

The gym is a good example of a place where things can get difficult. After the first 45 minutes of zumba class, you are sweating and unable to side-kick any higher, no matter how loudly the bandana-crazed drill sergeant yells. Someone behind you is entirely hogging the fan and you want to empty your water bottle over your head. Or pass out. Whichever happens first is fine.

Another example is being "stuck" in a crappy job. Your desk has been moved to the basement and you're working overtime on a dreadful project. Your boss passes by and blithely waves hello to the wall next to you, as if he finds the two of you indistinguishable. If he asked how it was going, you'd probably feel compelled to say everything is great! But an honest answer would be closer to, "Well Bob, I haven't yet gouged out my eyes with salad spoons... partially because I am an optimist, but mainly because I just don't carry around salad spoons."

Start by asking yourself why are you doing it. What do you get out of it, and how is that good for you? Working out is an easy one, the benefits are being healthy, feeling and looking good. The dreadful job, you might say, is necessary to pay your rent and that gym membership. But perhaps it is NOT necessary to do that particular soul-stomping job in order to make a living.

Which option serves you best? When are you doing yourself a favor by quitting, as opposed to depriving yourself of an opportunity to contribute to your overall happiness?

Two people in the same circumstances can end up with opposite conclusions. The difference is not the situation, but the choice. Your butt might be sore the next day, but you CHOOSE to take zumba because you love fitting into your skinny jeans, feel healthier, or enjoy the after cardio high. Your best friend might also love skinny jeans but despise zumba and anything resembling a gym, and choose to fit in them solely through diet.

That job is making you miserable and you don't care about the work. So why do it? Start looking for a better way to earn money that not only doesn't stress you out, but that you actually enjoy! Sometime when the going gets tough, the tough really do get going. As in, out-the-door. Goodbye.

Another way to look at your choices is to ask yourself whether you are quitting because you are going toward something better, and not simply reacting to difficulty by running away from it.

Have a goal you are excited about, a definite destination. There are many avenues to choose from to get where you want to be. As Lewis Carrol said, "If you don't know where you are going, any road will take you there." You are not confined to taking the miserable path through the basement office.

Why Real Learning Requires An OPEN Mind

Nearly every day, each of us have opportunities for additional training regarding some issue that we might want, or need to address. Have you ever wondered why so many individuals take so many courses and training programs, and often seem immediately enthusiastic, yet why so few of them actually use the techniques taught on a regular basis? In the vast majority of cases, we hinder our own opportunities for true learning because we refuse to adapt or consider alternatives, or we refuse to actually discipline ourselves to follow the steps and/ or methodologies that we have been taught. It is often our refusal to proceed with an OPEN mind that becomes our greatest deterrent to our own personal growth and/ or improvement. The significance of remaining OPEN to true learning requires some commitment to what that requires. Some of these components are evident obviously from a mnemonic perspective: Do we wish to discover opportunities and to be able to be prepared for them?; Will we find additional energy which is driven by our enthusiastic approach to learning and discover?; and, Do new and different ways of doing things help us enhance our opportunities and understanding?

1. Improvement in anything we do is driven by having the willingness and ability to be driven by opportunities. This requires first realizing that we need to expose ourselves to numerous alternatives, and to develop the ability to disseminate ideas and discover and evaluate their value and usefulness. Only when we are willing to open our minds up to learning more do we gain as much as we can from any sort of training.

2. The better trained we are, and the better we understand what we are taught, the more prepared we are to take timely action and to improve our personal performance. We can only prepare when we learn how to evaluate and plan, and that requires an open - minded appetite for useful knowledge and information.

3. Far too often, individuals seem to go through even extensive training programs in a less than full - hearted, or enthusiastic manner. Training by itself rarely serves any useful purpose unless we enthusiastically approach becoming better through gaining valuable knowledge, and then transforming it to viable and useful action and purpose.

4. Life is never a static condition. Since it is constantly evolving, each of us need to commit to continuously seek new approaches to best adapt to these changes. It is our attitude and willingness to escape our comfort zone and broaden our viewpoint that often determines how much, or little, we gain from any sort of training.

When we proceed seeking more knowledge and understanding, refusing to accept or simply maintain the status quo, we enhance our potential. Only those willing to remain open to all the potential opportunities maximize their own ability to truly learn effectively and in a meaningful manner.

Is The Fear of Change Holding You Back?

"Any change, even a change for the better, is always accompanied by drawbacks and

discomforts." - Arnold Bennett

One of the biggest issues which have been cropping up consistently with my clients lately is that of accepting and even embracing change. Even when they know that the converting over to a new way of doing things will eventually in the long run save them time and money to say nothing of alleviating stress in their lives, they continue to kick and scream every inch of the way.

I believe the first thing you need to do in order to embrace change gracefully is to find out why you're experiencing such an adverse reaction to this new request. For example, are you afraid of failure? Having a hard time trusting yourself to go through with the process, as in "Why bother? Nothing ever changes." These conditions are all due to issues of low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence, and resignation which you'll need to work on at some point, but let's take a look at the bigger picture here of why you're fighting this change so hard.

At what point in your life did you become so entrenched in the 'But that's the way we've always done it' dumpster? I know there are a lot of people who subscribe to the "If it ain't broke, don't fix it" choir, but that saying has one major flaw in it: what IF it can be improved by making a few changes? Should you just sit blindly by and do nothing because you're afraid of the work you'll need to do to modify something? No way!

Here's the thing about change. With change comes confusion, uncertainty, chaos, and not having all the answers. And not having all the answers is the thing that really rocks our boat. Because when we have all the answers, we can deal with those changes and it feels safe. Ah, but herein lies the kicker....there's no room for growth there and you succumb to mediocrity and ultimately fade into the woodwork so to speak.

Change is the very thing that adds spice to our everyday life. Picture this: if you ate one kind of cereal every morning for 40 years, don't you think you'd be a little bit tired of eating it at around day 14,610? (By the way, that number includes an extra 10 days for Leap years.) I'm pretty sure you just nodded your head yes at that one, right?

Change is the determining factor between having a thriving and bountiful life and business, or one that is merely existing and taking up space on the planet. Yes, change is hard to adapt to, and yes, it's uncomfortable when you're going through it - most of the best things in life do cause us some twinges of pain - but you need to realize that the immediate discomfort will soon pass.

So, the next time you're faced with any type of change, ask yourself these two questions:

1. What will the end result look like once I embrace this change and reach the goalpost?

2. If I do this now, what added benefits will it bring to my overall life?

We're talking 'big picture' here folks. Think bigger - you just might like it!

What Does Your Dream Life Look Like?

Every child has been asked what they wanted to be when they grew up. And more often than not, they had responded with "doctor," or "lawyer," or "movie star." It would always be some stereotype of success. It would always be something that was prevalent in both school books and popular media. Did you describe your dream life the same way when you were young? Don't be ashamed if you have; it's not your fault this information has been drilled into you from the start.

However, this doesn't mean that you should conform to such ideals. So what if that's what your parents or teachers wanted of you? Is that really what you want for yourself? You have your own unique perspective on life and the world you live in. The best life you could possibly live, then, is something you conjured up in your own mind. What do other people have to do with it?

So, ask yourself: what really is your dream life anyway? What does it look like? Chances are, it incorporates the elements of life you personally enjoy the most. It is a life that you maintain entirely on your own terms, one that you have complete control over. It is the kind of existence where your success depends on doing the things you love, and nothing else.

Still stumped? Think long and hard. If you had the chance to do only one thing for the rest of your days, what would it be? Forget your current obligations. Don't take your job, finances, or family into consideration. Whatever that thing is, be it cooking haute cuisine or building houses by hand, that is your dream life. That is what you should be pursuing.

Do you really want to waste away your precious time on Earth with your crappy job? When you feel that you should be doing something other than what you're doing now, then why don't you do it? There is no reason for you to stunt your growth as a person. There is no reason for you to stick to lame excuses. You know they're lame to begin with!

A man who slaves away day and night for a job he hates but still takes home millions of dollars is not a success. A man who makes the same income with a career he loves is the true success. By pursuing your dream life, you can be the latter man.

What's stopping you, then? Now that you know what your true goals are, you should go out there and fulfill them. Now that you have a better understanding of what your priorities should be, then the next step should be to avoid procrastination. The best life is an active life. There is no fairy godmother out there who can help you kick things off. In fact, you are your very own fairy godmother, and you have all the power in the world to make your wish come true. No matter the situation, you can only earn true success if you were responsible for your actions from the very beginning.

You Can Turn Your Mistakes, Magically, Into Opportunities

If you are like me, then you are human, and you make mistakes. Mistakes, however, are an opportunity if you seize that opportunity; and by doing just that you can become a master at overcoming your mistakes:

- Take the time to evaluate the mistake and then learn from it. A great way to evaluate is to look at what went right and what didn't.
- Take ownership of what you did that was incorrect or wrong.
- By taking ownership of your responsibility you are able to accept that you made the mistake.
- And finally, you can use your evaluation and learning to better yourself.

When you truly acknowledge and accept your responsibility and role in mistakes can you access the magic or treasure of the mistake.

As an entrepreneur, I am sure, you are more than familiar with mistakes. You probably have made both small mistakes and BIG mistakes along the way. Mistakes may, for some, put them right out of business or scare them out of business.

When you are in business, it is like walking through the jungle. You have to be prepared to be in the jungle and survive. You have to have thick skin, courage, perseverance and more. I bet you have had some customers that were close to totally impossible. Or a competitor that always seemed to be 3 steps ahead of you. If you do any marketing well, then you have made many mistakes. Because marketing success is all about learning from what didn't work.

This is the joy of an entrepreneur: the excitement of learning, the control to make mistakes and the willingness to be courageous and take risks. You persevere and you learn, continuously. Your positive attitude is essential in building a thriving businesses and enduring the lessons that you have to learn along the way.

Mistakes can be spun, magically into new income, new revenue

One way to do this "spinning into money", is to share your experience with others. Other people can benefit from your learning and their tension eases as they realize that they are not alone. You can also create your own coaching program to provide coaching, based on your experience to other businesses. An entrepreneur that is courageous can share their own personal mistakes, pointing out the challenges that they faced and how they overcame them, creates a synergy with other business owners. Suddenly, you are a speaker and coach, and people are following you, because you have risen to the level of expert.

Connect, connect, connect!

As an entrepreneur, you have to connect with other people. Your contacts and connections are vital when you see your sales slowing or if you decide to start a new business venture. Networking is just part of business. It gives you additional venues for sharing your expertise and sharing your advice.

WOW, the customer:

It is critical throughout your business to WOW your customers. "WOW" is all about service delivery, quality and customer service. Maybe you have had a challenging staff person that wasn't especially good at customer service. You know that that is essential for your long-term success. You have to take action with the employee to improve their performance, or change their responsibilities.

It becomes an opportunity to update your customer service policy and to re-train staff. You can also evaluate what can be automated: answering services, Q & A page on your website, automated messages.

Mistakes and challenges make it impossible for you to not look at your business. By taking on the opportunity you are able find the magic of the mistakes. What can you improve? Systems? Process? Policy? Operating a business with a constant process for improving your services, your products and your business, creates a thriving business. Use each mistake to review the process or policy and make the changes you need to, to improve it.

Your magical mistakes can set you apart from the competition. Customers will appreciate that you are constantly making your business work better. Using excuses instead of making magic will stall your business. You won't stand out as a mover and shaker. Of course, we would all like that perfect business model and business operation but the real way to get there is just what we have discussed here. Take mistakes, evaluate them, take out the lessons and improve yourself, your business, your operations, and a s result you will thrive!

Choosing Positive Self-Talk to Conquer Any Ambition

Do you feel as if you may be constantly talking yourself out of achieving success? The instant you begin to set in place aims for yourself, do you suddenly have nagging feelings about how you aren't capable of the task or how you just aren't qualified to carry it on?

If you have ever before gone through either scenario, you have got to shift how you answer to your internal dialogue. Rather than obeying your destructive commands, you can use positive self-talk to resist the negativity and beat virtually all stressed thoughts.

Preparing Goals and Sticking with Them using Positive Self-Talk

Are you, at first, full of enthusiasm when you first set goals for yourself? Are all of these thoughts then followed by uncertainty and self-defeating thoughts that stop you in your tracks well before you even make a start?

It can be very difficult to get the most from yourself when you are always talking yourself out of becoming successful. It is disheartening and discouraging, to have all these feelings always plaguing you. A lot of us, believe it or not, don't even realise we have them! All we know is that we don't have the self-assurance to follow our plans and arrive at our ambitions.

However there's another way!

Positive self-talk is a highly effective way to set aims and make sure you adhere to them, even when you've never been able to do this in the past. The way this works is that you figure out what goal is very important to you, and you plan the logistics of how you're likely to attain this goal. When self-doubt starts kicking in, you will react with statements and affirmations that establish your achievement while not giving up to the destructive stress. Seeing that you're reading through this page, it's very clear that you're no quitter and you're most certainly not a failure, so begin believing in your self!

Re-Programming Your Mind

Affirmations are, in essence, positive statements that re-program your mind for the positive. The instant you have a self-defeating thought you'd be ready to counter the negative with an encouraging affirmation. An example of a positive affirmation is: "I'm deserving of great achievement," or "I see myself in the champion's circle." What this does is replace negativity with thought processes which will assist you to move toward your goals instead of further removed from them.

Positive self-talk is much easier to implement than you might believe. You might not be aware of the extent of the negative talk presently in your mind. Yet, as soon as you start off with positive self-talk, you are going to all of a sudden realize that you're self-sabotaging the goals you set for yourself right from the moment that you make them. This practice can open up your eyes to just how much this inner dialogue has been interfering with your life. You'll really feel confident that you can now set targets and exceed them.

Through positive self-talk you'll be able to very easily set long and short-term goals for your self. And as soon as you use affirmations, you'll possess accessible tools to help you to propel yourself further than ever before. Learning to hush negative thoughts with positive thoughts is a superb move towards setting up and attaining long term goals in no time.

Life Is Wonderful

It is so simple and so easy to get what we want that we have a hard time to believe it. We are programmed to do things the hard and difficult way, in order to get what we want. We can not believe that we can get anything without hard labour, sweat and tears, obstacles
and misery.

This is nothing else but a tough old programmation, a conditioning from our childhood. If you are like me, you were bombarded as a child with expressions from adults about how hard life is and how we have to struggle to get something. We were submitted to a hazardous universe or a God of revenge who could pick us out without any reason to take revenge on us for something we did wrong. We needed to avoid being bad or wrong, but disease could strike us anyway. Sometimes they even said : "It's again a good one who's punished, and the bad one take off easily like usual without paying anything!". We learned that life wasn't fair. We lived in fear and thought life was a valley of tears, fear, struggle, pain, disease
and death?

How would it have been if they've told us the truth? The truth, nothing but the truth? That life is easy, wonderful. That miracles happen all the time and that we have the power to make them happen in our own life! That the universe loves us. That there is wealth and health for everyone. That we don't live in a universe of scarcity but of abundance. That we only have to put the right thoughts in our heads to make these dreams real for us.

What would your life have looked like if your parents and teachers would have taught you the truth?

You would have suffered much less! You would not have believed you were less than nothing. You would not have been filled with fear over your ears of getting sick or failing, of being stupid or being not good enough.

If you would have known from the beginning that you were a creation of the Creator, that you will always remain, that you will always be around, that you were created for a reason, and when you find this reason you will be happy, what would your life look like now? If you were told that you had talents, unique qualities, that make you a special person, and that you are on earth with the mission to offer these talents to others, where would you be right now and what would you be doing now?

Isn't it nice? The Genius who created this whole thing did really well : we are sent to earth with a mission and to be able to assume our mission we are already fully equipped from the beginning : we are gifted with natural talents and all we have to do is develop our talents and offer them to the world! Simply said, we have to do what we can do easily already and what we are talented for, and than happiness, satisfaction, love, money and everything we want comes flowing our way!

It is so beautiful, this concept! All we have to do is to do what we love! And of course we need to stop once for all to think we don't deserve happiness or wealth or health. All these thoughts are wrong because they go against the principles of creation of the Universe.

We are already wonderful! We are already loved! We are already rich! We are already free! We are already intelligent! We are already healthy!
Why? Because we were all this before we started our life. It is the way we really are. It is the way we were created, we were born. This is the truth about ourselves. Everything else is "learned" afterwards.

The good news is whatever is learned can be un-learned. Every programmation can be changed and replaced by a new program.

And again, life is wonderful, because a positive thought is 10,000 times more powerful than a negative thought. So you don't have to take another 40 years to undo the negative conditioning in your head. One positive thought can counterbalance 10,000 negative ones.

Can you imagine? Aren't we lucky?

If you choose to do so, you can rapidly turn around your negative program in your head. Go to the bookstore, buy some books with positive thoughts, put them at every toilet in the house, in the bathroom, in your bedroom, in your living room, and read them whenever you think of it or see them. It doesn't matter if you read one page after another or if you just open the book as it falls in your hands. The message you will receive will be the right one for you at that very moment.

Every morning you start your day by saying thank you to the Universe for your bed, your house, the roof over your head, the people living with your, the water coming out of your tap, the light switching on by a simple gesture of your hand, the food available, the choices you can make that day, the love you received in your life and the love you will receive, the miracles which will happen today and the air you can breath.

In your car, listen to CD's or cassettes with positive programmation. Listen to them while you make dinner, clean the house or iron your clothes.

Surround yourself with positive people and stop nourishing negative social talk. Don't watch television unless there is some really positive program.

There is a lot you can do to take a positive turn in your life. Don't think you can do nothing. You are responsible for your life now. Make your choice! Know that every thought you think is either one which will weaken you, or one which will make you feel stronger. 

The choice is yours!

A Step By Step Guide To Personal Development

Humans can change their life by changing their attitude. Personal development is a process that helps gain more control over thoughts and mind. The process need to be well thought and organized to be triumphant. This article will serve as a guide to fully completing and planning your venture for improvement. According to experts, thoughts and mind can be controlled through personal improvement. It helps modify and reprogram our minds to serve our requirements. Importantly, it makes our mind very capable and flexible. It actively changes our brain structure by reprogramming and conditioning our mind in better ways.

The initial step to personal development is self evaluation. Take into consideration all the weaknesses and strengths. In this way, ensure to be totally honest and unbiased. Bear in mind that this will serve as the base for the complete process. Thus make certain that the outcomes are true and accurate. Ask for opinions from those who are very close to you. It is because we do not notice every part about ourselves. It may be noticeable from other person's point of view. The second step is to determine. Yes, determine weakness and strengths that you want to develop. It is important to prioritize the needs.

Now after formulating a strategy or plan to improve self, strategize it. As you are already aware of what aspects you want to develop about yourself, plan particular interventions and state the goals clearly. Evaluate your goals at the end of the complete process. Nevertheless, the key step to personal development is 'putting into action'. This is the trickiest part. It is because you have already done with the planning and this is the phase to put that into actions. Keep in mind, this is the trickiest part so do not give yourself chance to commit errors.

Even a small error may increase the chances of being unsuccessful. The final step is appraisal. In this stage, goals that need to be met are verified. Do not let it upset you. In such case, retrace the taken steps. In case of being unsuccessful, reformulate the plan and go through the complete process repeatedly to achieve success in personal development. Nevertheless, following these steps will assist you in attaining your aim to attain the quest in personal improvement. Keep in mind, the way of self improvement is personal. As a result, make your own technique to develop self with these significant steps.

Each one has their own approach. These steps are more of a guide that one can make use of. Also, keep yourself motivated. Put your imagination power in practice. Many studies have revealed that imagining oneself taking an action is a best way to motivate oneself to take the step in near future. So visualize methods regularly to reprogram behaviors and thoughts. One of the excellent examples is professionals rehearsing mentally prior to a match or game. In this stage of personal development, stop blaming self. This is the most common trap and we happen to programmed to move blame to outside factors.

NLP - 8 Techniques To Overcome The Beliefs That Limit Your Ability And Gain Excellence In Your Task

By the time you read this NLP article completely, you will be amazed as there will not be any belief that would restrict your ability anymore. The NLP says that the beliefs that we hold give us both strength and empowerment. So, it becomes important to have the belief that can enhance your ability rather than restricting it.

NLP classifies the limiting beliefs into three categories as follows:

• Desperation - Under this situation, the person thinks that he can never achieve his goal under any circumstances. He desperately tries to achieve his goal but fails because he works with half-heartedness.
• Defenselessness - Under this, the person thinks that he can achieve his goal, but he rely more on luck and fate.
• Worthlessness - Under this, the person think that he is unable to deserve to achieve the goal. He finds himself as incapable and not worth any thing.

To which category do you belong? NLP can surely help you to come out of the limiting belief. These are 8 NLP techniques that can help you overcome the belief that restricts your ability and gain excellence:

1. Hold the belief that gives you strength and empowerment: Research has shown that the people who think they are unhealthy and suffering from any disease die early than the persons who are actually suffering from any diseases. NLP states that your thinking affects your both mentally and physically. Hold the belief that bears a positive impact on you.
2. Ignore the beliefs that restrict your energy and confidence levels: When you tell your mind that you cannot do a particular thing or you are not capable of doing any thing, then you surely never do that thing. Such beliefs are restricting you to achieve any thing are called as the 'limiting beliefs' in NLP.
3. Limiting belief can be the consequence of any significant experience in your life - come out of that experience with NLP: NLP sates that most of the beliefs that we hold are because of any kind of significant experience that you must have been through in your life. Once a boy was so focused on his target to hit the ball with his bat that he hurt his brother who was coming towards him. His parents scolded him. Since then he made up his mind that if he will go after his target he will hurt someone. This belief affected him badly in this adult life. Hence, the boy must have tried to overcome that bad experience and improved on it rather than allowing that experience to come with him all through his life. NLP calls this as framing the bad experience for well.
4. Make yourself aware of the belief limits you: When you do not attempt to do any task or you fail in the task that you have done, the first thing that most of the people do is, they try to justify their failure rather than finding out the ways to improve them. This is most common attitude of people, proved by NLP. Instead of this, you must find out the reasons that are responsible for your failure.
   Ask your self the following questions:
   a. Why is the goal unattainable for me?
   b. Why skills do I lack in to attain this?
   c. Why do I think that I do not deserve to achieve this goal?
5. Work on your limiting beliefs: Once you uncover the beliefs that are restricting you, try to eliminate those beliefs that are not allowing you to achieve your goal. Work on limiting beliefs and try hard to make changes. NLP techniques mentioned below can help you to do that. The techniques of NLP tries to eliminate the gap between you and your restricting beliefs.
6. Do not allow that belief take power over you: NLP advises you to work on your odd beliefs and get it out of your life as soon as possible before they gain power and superiority over you. Once they gain power over you, you will start losing your one or the other power or ability.
7. Uncover the purpose of the belief: Ask yourself how does this belief affects or benefits you. Give your belief a thought and find out the answer. NLP techniques can help you uncover the true purpose of your belief in your life. If you hold the belief that all men are troublesome, think and mould your belief like 'some characterless men are troublesome while all are not the same.'
8. Proving a wrong belief as wrong: This is one of the most powerful NLP techniques, which help you eradicate the limiting beliefs in your life. You have to prove wrong the wrong beliefs. The only way of doing that is, when you think that you cannot do any thing just go for it. Attempt to achieve that thing. It is natural that you may be unsuccessful in the first attempt but once you do it your false belief that you cannot do it shatters away.
   Belief change exercise:
   a. Replace your negative belief with the positive one.
   b. Analyze your dream and the circumstances in which you generated that belief.
   c. Examine whether it bears a positive or negative impact on you.
   d. If it is negative one, try out the most possible ways that you can find to replace it with the positive one.

This is most easy, simple yet powerful NLP technique that you can implement today for your benefit. It can help you eliminate the limiting beliefs and gain excellence in your task.