Look Up! - The Power Of Expectations

"We will always tend to fulfill our own expectation of ourselves" - Brian Tracy

As we know, UP is a direction. More importantly, it is a direction that we want to go. The first step in moving UP is to set our sights beyond our current circumstances. Inherent in the definition of UP is that it never stops. There is always one more rung on the ladder, one more battle to fight, one more person to help, and one more analogy to make. So, wherever we are today, we have room to improve.

What's holding us back? One of the main things keeping us from achieving more is that our expectations are set too low. When an expectation is set, our minds are so powerful and complex that our actions immediately begin to line up with that expectation. Robert K. Merton coined the phrase "self-fulfilling prophecy" to describe this phenomenon in his 1957 book Social Theory and Social Structure. Wikipedia defines a self-fulfilling prophecy as "a prediction that, in being made, actually causes itself to become true".

My Fair Lady. In George Bernard Shaw's play Pygmalion, Eliza Doolittle is transformed from a Cockney flower girl to a lady. What made the difference? The image that she had of herself changed when others treated her differently. Colonel Pickering called her "Miss Doolittle," which Liza says began to teach her self-respect. She explained to Colonel Pickering, "The difference between a lady and a flower girl is not how she behaves, but how she's treated. I shall always be a flower girl to Professor Higgins, because he always treated me as a flower girl, and always will, but I know I can be a lady to you because you always treat me as a lady, and always will."

We See It Every Day. Most of us have observed the power of expectations with a familiar example. A co-worker mentions to us late in the day that they think that they're coming down with a cold. We may respond with something like, "I've heard there's something going around". We could even say, "You look all right to me". It really doesn't matter what we say at that point as the person really expects to get sick. Sure enough, the next day, they call into work sounding just awful announcing that there is no possible way they could work today.

"You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them." - Michael Jordan

"Believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact." - William James

Who Cares? Who cares enough about us to impose expectations upon us? The obvious answer is friends and family. Often, these expecations are normal and positive. For example, if our spouse expects us to be home to have dinner with the family, this could be a wonderful norm. Since we care about our friends and family, they have more power than anyone else to influence our own opinion of our ability. Frequently, well-meaning relatives will deter someone from pursuing their true life purpose.

One of the ways that this happens is by planting doubt. Let's say we truly believe that we have an ability to write. We also have a desire to pursue writing as a career. In subtle ways, some of our friends and family begin to plant doubts about our skills or the opportunities in this career path. They may think that they are protecting us; however, sometimes, the result is that we choose another path that we perceive to be less risky.

What About Me? That's right, we are the most important person in our lives in determining our place in this world. We are constantly comparing ourselves to others. We hear our own voice more than any other. So, what are we saying to ourselves? If we are saying that we can do it, we are much more likely to dismiss evidence to the contrary. Take one of the most famous historical examples, how successful would David have been against Goliath if he were talking defeat to himself? It's possible that he would have been unsuccessful if he had not been rehearsing his past successes in killing the lion and the bear with his bare hands.

Aside from the people in our inner circle of influence, there are others that have the ability to set expectations for us, if we give them the power. We just need to be aware that this occurs. Sometimes, we are more likely to change our opinion of ourselves because someone that we respect has a different viewpoint. Instead of taking their word for it, we must evaluate their opinion as objectively as possible. We don't want to close ourselves off from change, however, we do want to make sure that any change is a conscious choice.

When Did I Choose? Unfortunately for many, the past controls the present. For others, concerns about the future significantly impact their current view. If the past is controlling us, it is generally in the form of guilt. In the case of guilt, we don't feel worthy of success because of what we've done or haven't done. As hard as it may be, we must let go of our feelings of unworthiness. Additionally, we must forgive anyone for anything that is eating away at us. Unforgiveness doesn't affect the other person as much as it affects us. In fact, we would be shocked to find out how little time people think about us.

If the future is controlling us, it is generally in the form of anxiety. The Bible tells us with good reason in Philippians 4:6, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Fear of the future has the ability to immobilize us in the present. More than causing us to be ineffective, guilt and anxiety have been linked to many health risks including heart disease, ulcers, and degraded immune system.

From this, we surmise that the only appropriate time to set our expectations is in the present. While we must consider our experiences and education from the past as well as our dreams and goals for the future, the only time that we can actually take action is now. The great news in looking up from where we are is that we can change where we're going.

"We must learn to reawaken and keep ourselves awake... by an infinite expectation of the dawn, which does not forsake us in our soundest sleep. I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by a conscious endeavor. - Henry David Thoreau, Walden, from "Where I Lived, and What I Lived For"

Subliminal Blaster

I just wanted to let you know about this FREE offer.  You can now get this great FREE download of Subliminal Blaster which will project subliminal messages on to your screen to help you with various aspects of your life such as quitting smoking or losing weight for example, please be aware though you are only to use this software on yourself as it is illegal to send subliminal messages to anyone else.

Subliminal Blaster Download Site Here

Below is the write up of the product:

This self-help freeware application is designed to flash subliminal messages, but its ability to modify behavior is up to you to evaluate. Subliminal Blaster's intuitive interface offers a wide variety of preset message categories, though you can easily add your own. You can select from 51 self-help areas including dealing with stress and pain, quitting smoking, and slimming sensibly. Messages are positive affirmations such as "I am always improving" and "My body feels good." You can set the location, frequency, and font for your selected messages, which will only display when the program is open but will display over any application. Subliminal Blaster is a handy, well-designed program for those who believe in the power of subliminal messages.

What is it?


Subliminal Blaster is a small utility that installs on your PC and works quietly in the background. Using a patented subliminal delivery system, Subliminal Blaster flashes safe and unobtrusive messages around your monitor as you use your PC, but its ability to modify behavior is up to you to evaluate. Because of the speed in which they're delivered to your screen, your conscious mind will merely see a "flicker" -- it won't have the pace to capture the message. However the subconscious mind absorbs every single message... and uses each one to change your thought patterns, your behaviours, even your body! And that's great -- because, your "conscious" mind isn't responsible for changing your automatic reactions and habits. Only your subconscious is! Your subconscious mind is built as a tool for betterment. It's there to respond to your environment. It "sees" things you don't even realize. Every sound. Every picture. Every phonetic nuance. Everything. So it makes sense that if your brain "reacts" to the information its fed that you should probably feed it the best information you can, right? These messages are statements of positive intent, like: I learn fast; I am calm and confident always; I enjoy speaking on stage; I attract my ideal partner easily; Every day in everyway I'm getting better, and better. Using Subliminal Blaster, you can easily: Banish negative behavior patterns; Enjoy perfect health and heal any illness, ailment or disease; Realise your perfect body weight, appearance and vitality and keep it that way. Enjoy perfect relationships with others whether friends, family or others. Maintain absolute happiness, harmony and peace in your life at all times. Dissolve stress and tension. Destroy bad habits in a flash. And best of all, you don't have to do a thing! The whole system sits on your desktop, utilizing time you already spend at your computer every moment you use your PC, you're creating a fantastic new you.

Subliminal Blaster Download Site Here

Need Creative Solutions? Need New Ideas? Get Out and Move

Here's an all-too-common problem: You are stumped for a solution to a problem. You need new ideas and you need to turn on your creative mind.

Next time you find yourself in this situation, try this method for coming up with new ideas:

1. Write out a list of open-ended questions that describe the problem you are trying to solve. The more thoroughly you write about the problem in the form of questions, the better your answers will be.
2. Next get outside and take a walk. Really you can be flexible here, you can also go hiking, running or hop on a bike. The main two ingredients you are looking for are fresh air and exercise.
3. Often your ideas will come to you while you are walking and you will hardly be able to wait until you can get back to write down your new ideas.
4. At other times, it will seem as if your solutions are just on the edge of your mind, but not yet clearly in focus yet. When this happens, come home and start doing some non-stop writing in a journal you keep. This means you write down everything that comes to mind and you don't stop writing until you have written for ten minutes (a kitchen timer is a great tool for this).
5. If you came up with your new idea when you wrote, then run with it. Otherwise, simply review what you've written, also review the list of questions you wrote before you took your walk, and highlight a few segments that seem almost on target. Then if need be, write again for another ten minutes.

Almost inevitably, your solutions and ideas will have come to you before you get to this stage. On the off chance that you still have little to show for your efforts, get with someone else and do some brainstorming.

Ideas need time to grow, but the change between sitting at a desk "thinking" and getting out and moving your body is an idea generator that you should find works at least 90% of the time. When you add the non-stop writing exercise, you are bordering on a sure thing.

Great Tips for Beginning Students of NLP

Thanks in large part to the Internet, the amount of information available on NLP can be a bit overwhelming, especially to a beginner. First step - don't worry! Many have been in your shoes before and attained deep and powerful skills.

Here are some tips gathered from my personal experience as a Master Practitioner that will help guide you on your way.

I) "Take it easy, but take it." - Woody Gutherie.

Many pieces of NLP are very in-depth and cannot be mastered all at once. Make sure you are biting off manageable pieces. Even if you are simply focusing on one specific technique, for example the meta-model, it is possible and recommended to break it down even further into its component parts. Learn one part well and then move on to another. Was Rome built in one day?

II) Formulate a Specific Plan of Action

Even if you are working with manageable chunks, it is still possible to be overwhelmed. Think about your goals and the sequence of pieces that you will need in place to make that happen. When choosing a NLP piece to work on, ask yourself questions like "What piece can I learn know that will make all of the other pieces simpler to learn?" or "Which piece will have the most immediate impact on my life?" You can even take it to a simpler place: "Which piece will cause me to have the most fun today?"

III) Get Off Your Couch and Out Into the World

At the end of the day, all of the reading in the world won't help you one iota without concrete action. It is in the real world that we make real strides. Get out there and practice - you will probably surprise yourself! Do you want to be a Master Practitioner or a Master Researcher?

IV) Develop a Daily NLP Practice Regimen

Daily practice is essential to progress, even if you only spend a few minutes each day. Once you get started practicing every day, you will begin to see more and more opportunities to apply your training. Don't forget to use them.

V) Practice Receiving Feedback in a Constructive Way

No matter what the content of the feedback, you can use it as a learning opportunity. Negative feedback tells you what to work on, and positive feedback helps you realize you are on the right path. Of course, don't forget to celebrate your successes!

VI) Remember that Learning is a Process

No one has ever said that learning something new is easy. Remember that there will be bumps along the way and that this is totally normal! Take comfort in the fact that you are taking time to work on yourself -a step that many people never undertake. Appreciate your progress and enjoy the journey.

VII) Take notice of NLP Occurring in its Natural Environment

Sometimes excellence occurs in places you never would have thought of. These are great opportunities for you to absorb and experience excellence first hand - don't let them go to waste! Where do you think NLP came from originally?

VIII) Remember and Apply this Simple but Insightful Joke.

A tourist has tickets to a concert at Carnegie Hall but can't find the way. He asks a pedestrian "How do you get to Carnegie Hall?" The answer: "Practice Practice Practice!"

IX) Don't forget to have fun!

Seriously. It is a well-known scientific fact that people learn better, faster and with more depth when they are having fun. It sounds simple, but if you think of your training as a difficult and unwanted chore, you will surely get lost along the way and your practice will suffer. Plus, by having fun you get the added benefit of having fun!

I hope these tips will help practitioners of all levels deepen and improve their NLP experience and their daily lives. I wish you good luck and lots of fun on your journey!

Time For Stock Take in Your Life

Every year shops and businesses do a stock take of all their products and services and are able to define where there business is going and what profits they have made since their last stock take etc Now we could all say yep OK what has that got to do with me and stress, but have you ever thought about doing that in your own life. Interesting isn't, what if we were to take time two to three times a year and do our stock take on our own life.

But I think if we are going to sit and stock take in our lives then we are going to have to go at it with an open mind being honest with ourselves about own life. And with out allowing assumptions on what other people think of us. It has to be done in way that you are free to do as you wish. We can get so wrapped up in conforming to what is expected of us and from society that we forget about ourselves. We just keep going with the flow of life.

Well just maybe its time we should take time and do a stock on our life and think about all the things we want to do. How many times do you read a story about someone that is dying or they are old and they are contemplating their lives and thinking about all the things they wished they had done in their life. Hindsight is a wonderful thing but only when you don't wait till you're dying and old and its all too late. If we were to do a stock take often then we would be living our lives to the fullest and when we are old we can look back and say hey I did everything I wanted, I achieved a lot and I had ago.

So how does this relate to stress in our life? Well if we were living our lives how we wanted and doing what we wanted to do in our lives then we wouldn't have stress in our life. We would be living in a state of joy and happiness.

So take some time out of your life, away from your everyday life and the people. Take yourself away for a couple of days and sit under a tree and think about what it is you would like to do in your life. Don't think about oh but what if this, but what if that, it's not important and really just an excuse of why you're not going to do it. Ask yourself if I did this or I did that how would I feel, and if you get that excited rush through the body then there is your answer it means go and do it.

So if you want to make some changes in your life and feel hesitant to do it then let me tell you something from experience. Often when we want to make a huge change in our life we hesitate because we are not sure what's on the other side or how everything will work out. But as soon as you make the decision and you take the leap you don't look back and everything just changes for the better and you have a whole new world right there before you and you think to yourself why didn't I do this sooner. So don't worry about it just do it and it all works out like you never expected.

On a side note here writing this article it reminds of the story in the Movie Pretty Woman. Yes I know it was like a love story but if you look at the guys side this is what he did, he made changes in a whole new direction in his life. This movie is a great example of what I am talking about.

So start doing a stock take on your life now, and start taking action and doing what you want to do in your life, don't wait till your dying or you're old. Just Do It Now.

10 Powerful Tips To Stop Smoking

Whether you are using Nicotine Replacement Therapy, Hypnosis or just Cold Turkey, these strategies and hints are for aiding you to stop smoking and are sure to assist you in helping your neurology change and thus enable you to stop smoking with ease. It is up to you to ensure that you do these things to really enhance what you are doing, the more effort you put into these exercises, the easier it is to stop smoking for good.

Powerful Stop Smoking Hint 1.

Being a smoker is like cycling with stabilisers attached to the wheels, you can find it hard to be balanced without smoking. Now, when you cycle freely again, the natural balance returns.

When people smoke, more than half of what they breathe is fresh air - pulled through the cigarette right down into the lungs. So if you feel any cravings you can instantly overcome them by taking three deeper breaths. Imagine breathing from that space just below your belly button. Whenever you do this you put more oxygen into your bloodstream. This means you can use deep breaths to change the way you feel instantly and give you power over the way you feel and help you let go of those old cravings and thus making it easier to stop smoking.

Powerful Stop Smoking Hint 2

Next, think now of all the reasons you don't like smoking, the reasons that it's bad and the reasons you want to stop smoking. Write down the key words on a piece of paper. For example, you experience breathlessness, it's dirty, filthy and your clothes smell, your friends and family are concerned and it's expensive, unsociable and so on. Then, on the other side of the paper, write down all the reasons why you'll feel good when you've succeeded in stopping. You'll feel healthier, you'll feel in control of your self, your senses are enhanced, your hair and clothes will smell fresher and so on. Whenever you need to, look at that piece of paper.

Powerful Stop Smoking Hint 3

Next, we are going to programme your mind to feel disgusted by cigarettes. I want you recall 4 times when you thought to yourself "I've gotta quit", or that you felt disgusted about smoking. Maybe you just felt really unhealthy, or your doctor told you in a particular tone of voice 'You've got to quit' or somebody you know was badly affected by smoking. Take a moment now to come up with 4 different times that you felt that you have to quit or were disgusted by smoking.

Remember each of those times, one after another, as though they are happening now. I want you to keep going through those memories and make them as vivid as possible. The more vivid you make those memories, the easier it will be to stop smoking. See what you saw, hear what you heard and feel how you felt. I want you to take a few minutes now to keep going through those memories again and again, overlap each memory with the next until you are totally and utterly disgusted by cigarettes.

Powerful Stop Smoking Hint 4

Have a think to yourself about the consequences of you not stopping smoking now, if you just carry on and on. Imagine it, what will happen if you carry on smoking. What are the consequences? Imagine yourself in 6 months time, a years time, even 5 years time if you do not stop smoking now. Think of all the detrimental effects of not stopping right now and how a simple decision you make today can make such an impact on your future.

Next, imagine how much better is your life going to be when you stop smoking. Really imagine it's months from now and you successfully stopped. Smoking is a thing of the past, something you used to do. Keep that feeling with you and imagine having it tomorrow, and for the rest of next week. In your mind, imagine stepping in to that non-smoking version of you and feel how it feels to be a non-smoker.

Powerful Stop Smoking Hint 5

Also, your mind is very sensitive to associations, so it's very important that you have a clear out and remove all tobacco products from your environment. Move some of the furniture in your house and at work. Smokers are accustomed to smoking in certain situations. So, for example, if you used to smoke on the telephone at work move the phone to the other side of the desk. Throw away ashtrays, old lighters and anything that you used to associate with smoking. Make your environment conducive to stopping smoking.

Powerful Stop Smoking Hint 6

Smokers sometimes use their habit to give themselves little breaks during the day. Taking a break is good for you, so carry on taking that time off - but do something different. Walk round the block, have a cup of tea or drink of water, or do some of the techniques on this programme. In fact, if possible drink a lot of fruit juice. When you stop smoking the body goes through a big change. The blood sugar levels tend to fall, the digestion is slowed down and your body starts to eject the tar and poisons that have accumulated. Fresh fruit juice contains fructose which restores your blood sugar levels, vitamin C which helps clear out impurities and high levels of water and fibre to keep your digestion going. Also try to eat fruit every day for at least two weeks after you have stopped.

Also when you stop, cut your caffeine intake by half. Nicotine breaks down caffeine so without nicotine a little coffee will have a big effect. Drink 8-10 glasses of water (ideally bottled) to help wash out your system.

Powerful Stop Smoking Hint 7

You were used to using cigarettes to signal to your body to release happy chemicals, so next we are going to programme some good feelings into your future. Allow yourself to fully remember now a time when you felt very deep ecstasy, pleasure or bliss, right now. Take a moment to recall it as vividly as possible. Remember that time - see what you saw, hear what you heard and feel how good you felt. Where abouts in your body were those feelings, imagine turning them up and spreading them through your body to make them more intense.

Keep going through the memory, as soon as it finishes, go through it again and again, all the time squeezing your thumb and finger together. In your mind, make those images big and bright, sounds loud and harmonious and feelings strong and intensified. We are making an associational link between the squeeze of your fingers and that good feeling.

Okay, stop and relax. Now if you have done that correctly when you squeeze your thumb and finger together you should feel that good feeling again. Go ahead do that now, squeeze thumb and finger and remember that good feeling.

Now we're going to programme good feelings to happen automatically whenever you are in a situation where you used to smoke but now you stop smoking.

So, next I'd like you to squeeze your thumb and finger together, get that good feeling going and now imagine being in several situations where you would have smoked, but being there feeling great without a cigarette. See what you'll see hear and take that good feeling into those situations without a need for a cigarette.

Imagine being in a situation where someone offers you a cigarette and you confidently say 'No thanks, I don't smoke'. And feel fantastic about it!

Powerful Stop Smoking Hint 8

Get social support. Your commitment to stopping smoking for the rest of your life can be made much easier by talking about it to friends and family and letting them support you. They will congratulate you on doing so well too! You really did stop smoking.

Powerful Stop Smoking Hint 9

Be aware of making excuses for yourself. Some people talk themselves into smoking, especially if they encounter a stressful situation and in the past they used to deal with it by smoking. If those old thoughts pop into your head, shout the word "STOP" in your head, to stop the thoughts from progressing. Nicotine just stresses your body more and is like that itch that can never be properly scratched; the more you smoke, the more you have to. So say "STOP" and steer clear of old slippery slopes.

Powerful Stop Smoking Hint 10

Reward yourself. Congratulate yourself. Feel how good it feels to stop smoking and be a non-smoker. Treat yourself each time you get past a certain milestone; the first week or first month, the six month target. Let yourself know that you did something really special here.

Keep on using your brain, stretching it and helping your self, by running through these exercises time after time; you are sure to be able to make it easier and easier and successfully stop smoking for good.